exam :(

damn. I really really HATE TRIALS.
I'm DAMN SCARED.
let's hope I won't fail this years -_-

anyway, my family and I went to Damansara Perdana yesterday.
Imran is sick again :(
I hope he will be get better soon!

my family and I went to Tesco today,
just random shopping.
Wish I could go to The Curve, but that place jual mahal lah.
sheesh mana ade duit nak beli >.>

I found a cute pair of flat shoes at Tesco,
very cute tersangat nak beli, plus it's cheap. It's around RM20.00
but,my mum nagged me and she never let me to buy them -_-

sheesh.
seriously, I haven't shopping or go out for 19 years in my life.
my mum won't let me to go out, even go to town, she won't let me.
Yeah, I know she protect me for my safety,
ATLEAST please me to go out.
I really hate to stuck here in my house.
My life seems like a bird in cage.
And I never know what's going on at outside.

One of my friends told me about myself.
She worried about myself because I always quiet in class.
Even not really talkactive person. (hell, I'm not talk person)
She told me that if I keep going like this,
I won't able to interact to other people when I went to university then.

I wish my mum read this, I wanted she understand my feelings about this.
I don't like being caged here, I wanted to be free.
She won't let me to be creative, she won't let me to be active in event.
My parent never notice or know about me, what I doing.

Dear mum,
I know you wanted to protect me from dangerous world,
And I understand what you want me to be,
And I really appreciate for every thing you done for me.
We always fight about nonsense things and we always forgive each other.

Dear mum,
I'm apologize for everything I done on you.
I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings.
I'm know I'm rebel, but,
I wanted you know my feelings.
I wanted you know that I'm not longer child anymore.
I am 19 years old, mum.
Next year, I will turn 20 years old.

I wanted to be free,
I wanted to free from being negative
I wanted to do anything I want,
including art, friends, and anything.

I'm envy to see everyone,
that they have big circle social.
They can do anything they want,
being creative to do something.

I?
I'm not allowed to do anything,
even doing creative art for my place.
I'm being pressured,
to be their proud daughter,
and doing great things they wanted me to do.

what a sad world.
I wish I could live to somewhere else.

away

bad news for you guys/gals,
I will be not here,
and I will away for 1 month
because I was preparing for my trial exam.

So, I might be busy to study
(heck I only study little -_-)

and I don't might have time to blogging here.
If you were bored, just message me if you really need me :3
er I mean to talk to me for something else.
or you might want to cheer me lol

Well, see you later :)

camwhore + wapanese

Camwhore-ism
Cam - is a short for Camera.
Whore - is a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.
-ism is a suffix used for certain beliefs, culture, practices and whatsoever.

Put them together; Camwhore-ism, derived from 21st century popular word in the internet "Camwhore" to describe people who loves to take pictures of themselves especially with cameraphones and post them in the internet. Much seen in blogs, myspace and friendster. Taglines often include "Am I cute?", "Who dis cute gurl?" with unnatural poses and weird smiles that fakes your true beauty.

No, I do not refer those who takes holiday pictures or everyday life pictures for memories sake. But to take a snapshot in front of the mirror or from a certain angle with your cameraphone... what is the point? Is it to show how good-looking you are to the world?

Even more sickening is when you deny that you're not even pretty, but still, you camwhore and publicize yourself in the virtual world. Contradiction of words, isn't it?

Even worse?
When you dress up as something you're not or put on something that you don't even need, just to make someone who loves that kind of look say "OMG YOU'RE SO F*CKING CUTE!!!"
PRETENTIOUS MUCH?


Camwhores are modern day narcissists; they love themselves to bits that they JUST HAVE to take pictures of themselves, because no one bothers to take your pictures for you. Pitiful.

*source : Death_Glare

I'm quite agree with her post.
Her article make me thinking about camwhore.

I don't get it.
Why?
Why these generation always do camwhore all day?
To do anything to make your sexy and pretty e.g,
holding your breast, wearing tube or top or whatever.
To show you're prettier than.
Jeez, get a life.
You should be grateful with yourself that you got perfect body,
face, and everything GOD made to you.
But you think it's ugly.
You want to change yourself, so that you can be accepted by everybody.

You sucks.

Geez, I can't stand with them.
Posting their picture on myspace or facebook and also,
tag themself "Am I cute?", "Deadly Pose" and etc.

It is endless :/
I did camwhore before,
(it's not like other girl in myspace, try check my previous page/facebook/myspace and you will see my camwhore were FAIL heh. no so good lol)
But, I getting tired of them
It's not the way and I want before.

Camwhore is not.. my stuff.
Only you play with them, sooner or later,
you will get tired of them.

It's just waste of time.

Same also with Wapanese. (Japanese+Wannabe)
They might like Japanese anime/manga but they adapt Japan's culture in their daily life.
They will speak in Japanese, wearing like Japanese, drink or eat Japanese even they're live at Malaysia.

heh. They think they're Japanese and speak Japanese fluently.
Fluent in Japanese is okay, at least they did not overdo and annoying to other people.

Imagine that you bring along your wapanese friends,
they will call your parents "oka-san" or "oto-san"
instead calling them "pak cik" or "mak cik"
If you ask your parents about this, sure this sound kinda rude.
Can't they use proper word in Malay when meeting with other people?

This is too much. Heck they're think they live Japan, but actually they live in Malaysia.
Get real life lady and gentlemen.

If you fluent with Japanese, that's okay.
AT LEAST you should know where you are live now.
Calling them by using Japanese words,
it's rude to other people.

Bukankah lagi manis kalau kita berbahasa tempatan dan bercakap dengan orang tempatan.
Budaya Malaysia amat kaya,
janganlah kita taksub dengan bahasa asing sehingga melupakan diri sendiri dan tempat asal dirimu.

tagged and tagging

gosh, I got tagged by ijat again :3

1.

1. Suka nama ape?
- farah ♥

2. Perkara yg tidak disukai:
- org yg tunjuk pandai, hyprocrites, perasan "bandar"
and showing off (mcmlah baru punya, padahal mak bapak belikan)

3. Tempat yang paling disukai:
- my own bedroom and shopping mall ♥

4. Perwatakan anda macam mana? Bagi saya 4.

* lazy
* boring (I'm not really talkactive person..)
* sleepy
* daydreaming :)

5. lagu favourite? give me 2 favourite songs..
* Utada Hikaru - Prisoner of Love
* Kotoko - Real OniGokko

6. Pernah suka atau minat seseorang tak?
- Yes, I do.

7. Lucky person who being tagged..

*
*
*
*
I will edit this later :)

2.

1. At what age do you wish to get marry married?
- 25 or 26.

2. Where will you go if someone sponsors you ticket?
- Korea, Japan, Maghribi.

3. What's your favorite thing to do?

* online
* taking photo
* playing with cat
* sleeping
* drawing on tablet :3

4. Do you think that money can buy happiness?
Nope. I don't think so.
Money may bring happiness but it won't buy your happiness for your love.
Money bring fortune and wealth to us.

5. If you have one dream to come true, what would it be?
- To get true love.

6. Do you believe that you can survive without money?
Nope. If you survive without money, how you want trade your item?

7. What are you afraid to lose the most?
My friends, my family, my pet and my true love.

8. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
- DSLR camera
PS3
laptop
PC
and of course for my parents and my education :D

9. How would you describe the person you like?
hard to tell. He never noticed about me.

10.List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you:

*love car
* love gundam
* love writing something weird and funny


11. What are the requirements that you wish from the other half.
* personality and beauty.

12. If you could rewind time, would you?
* Yes I would do. I want to spend my time with someone I missed so much.

13. What is your ambition?
- photographer. Probably artist or illustrator (I think..)

14. If you can teleport, where would you go?
- away from people who keep pressured me.

15. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
- my youth
- my beauty
- my family
- my pet

16. If you could undo doing one mistake in the past, what would it be?
- anything I do.

18. What music have you been listening recently?
Coldplay and some Jpop/Jrock recently

19. What is the one thing you cannot do but you wish you could?
- I don't know. Let keep it secret ♥

20.Did you love someone with all your heart?
- Of course, yes ♥
wish he know about me.

3.

1. What brand do you love most? Give me only 1.
- GAP

2. Are you waiting for your prince charming now?
Not sure. I think he never know about me.

3. Type or Write?
Both.

4. Superman or Batman?
I don't like superhuman or heroes to kick bad guys, dude.
I prefer to guy have abilities :)

5. Is your school rock?
Not really. They suck.
But we do rock our school :)

6. Are you nerd?
Sorta. I wear spec everyday.'
Am I nerd?

7. A, B, C.
?

8. Where do you want to go?
- shopping and vacation

9. What type is your house?
bungalow :)

10. Are you popular?
heck no. Only socialis girl popular now.

11. Did you love people who gave you this tag?
Love? He's just penpal :)


4.

1. Apakah barang idaman yang tak mampu atau belum dibeli?
- laptop (Mac) , Wacom tablet, DSLR camera, new handphone.

2. Orang yang awak minat kat sekolah atau kat mana-mana namanya start huruf apa?
- Let keep it secret.

3. 5 benda yang disayangi:

* my best friend
* him
* henfon(?) buat baling je ah
* pc!
* laptop
* (?) my family - including my pet too.

4. 6 aktiviti yang dilakukan ketika bosan:

* online
* drawing
* sleeping
* eating
* playing with kitten
* playing games.

5. 5 Artis kegemaran dan harap akan berjumpa dengan artis tersebut samada luar negara atau tempatan.

* L'arc en Ciel
* Shokotan
* Gazette
* SID
* Danny Choo

6. Orang yang akan kena tag:

* I will do this later


5.

1. Jelaskan perangai buruk yang ada pada diri anda.
- bad temper. I hate people always be kecoh with myself.

2. Jelaskan perangai baik yang ada pada diri anda.
- be silent. I let them talk first.

3. Ceritakan pengalaman lucu yang masih tersimpan di dalam kotak memori anda.
many.

4. Ceritakan, masa bila anda bertemu dengan jejaka idaman anda?
during school days

5. Berikan 3 perkataan yang anda sebut semasa berjumpa dengan jejaka idaman anda?

* hello..
* do I know you?
* thanks..

6. Bagaimanakah anda berkenalan dengan jejaka idaman anda?
it happened suddenly.

7. Berikan nama singkatan bagi jejaka idaman anda.
><

8. Pernahkah anda terpijak atau terkena tahi anjing?
hell NO

9. Pernahkah anda terberak dalam seluar?
only when I was baby, stupid.

10. Apakah yang akan anda lakukan apabila bertemu dengan Pontianak?
real or just actress?
I will recite Yassin to her.

new update

finally I found right layout :3
I like these title,
" I am happy for who I am, And Not who I am Not"

I really HATE to being someone else that not who I am
It feel like you pretend to be someone else.
You wanted to accepted by people around you,
so that you can be friend with them,
and you won't be alone.

FINE if you want be like this,
go AHEAD.
I don't care of you,
even you are my friends.

But,
I won't change myself for people.
I'm happy with who I am,
I don't care what do you think about me,
go AHEAD and you can talk bad things behind me.
Because I don't care of you all
Because you always hurt me all time,
no matter you asked my help and you keep talk bad things about me.

Thus, you BETTER ACCEPT me who really I am.
I don't need you anymore,
you betrayed my trust and our relationship
because your stupidest things.

Go live to the place you think belong to you.
You may call yourself urban girl
but you only "kampung girl"
in our homes.

Just go away.
I don't want to see you anymore.
You're not longer in my friend's list :<

I'm really sad that I found out my friends betrayed me for these stupid things.
Stupid girl.

away

helo there :)
sorry for not being here,
I'm damn busy today.
and too much things I need to do.
don't worry, I will keep blogging when I have free time :D
just kinda busy nowadays,
because I have examination next month.
so, I'll not be here for a while :)

I'm thinking to changing my blogger's layout.
don't worry, I will pick better layout.

see ya later :)

just random post today..

I'm sorry guys/gals
I rarely to blogging right now.
and I feel pressured by my parents.
They wanted me to excel in study and exam.
I feeling burden and somehow I feel depressed.

I missed my bestie friends.
Wish she could be here to listen my thought.

I know mother is the best,
but she always think I'm child
even I'm adult right now.

I don't think she would understand about me.
I rather to keep my feelings than telling her.